Alive

I always thought that what I wanted most was a voice; both in terms of a musical instrument and the ability to publicly express worthwhile opinions. But I've realised just these last few days that a voice, of any sort, is nothing without a platform from which to be heard, and without the ears of somebody listening.

When I read over Poem 10 (which is also a song that I actually performed once, with Mike Pooley, in a song writing competition), I have a feeling I already knew this.

Poem 10, Alive, August 2003

Yesterday the road was wet
From where the rain fell.
I’ve so many stories,
But no-one to tell.
And underneath the harbour bridge
Stand a couple holding tight,
Afraid that if they don’t, their love
Might escape, off into the night.
I can see the lights
Of the cars above me
But down here on the ground
It is dark and empty.
There’s a hole, in my life
And I don’t know what will fill it
God heals my soul, to give life
And I know Satan can not kill it,
Still I feel
Broken.

This is my city
But it seems so surreal.
I can’t always find the words
To express what I feel.
I am me, I am alive
Why should I want more?
But sometimes I still wonder
What am I living for?
In a pub a man is
Singing a Greenday song
But no-one is listening
And that is so wrong.
There’s a hole, in my life
And I don’t know how to fill it
God – heal my soul, and give life
And I’ll know Satan can not kill it
Still I feel
Broken

I’d just done a dance class
I’d an ache in every limb
And as I walked along,
I still thought of him.
I crave your friendship
You reassure my busy mind
But after all my searching
I’ve realised you’re not for me to find.
This then is the lesson
Which is evident
God, won’t you help me
To be content.
There’s a hole in my life
One day we’ll fill it
God healed my soul, gave me life
Praise – no one will ever kill it
I won’t be
Broken